treat others
as you’d like
to be treated
~
expectations
dangerous assumptions
we fix on others
~
how could I
possibly know
what you needed
~
your body
your vagina
our love entered
our dead baby
exited
~
as a man
was it wrong
to lust
after you
~
you
needed
closeness
~
without
sex
~
now
I understand
~
her soul cried out
it hurt so much
I tried to listen
~
you can never understand my pain
don’t EVER say you can !
~
personal truths
are not
universal truths
~
my pain
is my
only connection
to him
~
that’s all
I have
~
my little baby
are you in heaven now ?
~
we went home
from the hospital
on mother’s day
~
empty
without our
little boy
~
little baby
please look after
your mommy
~
I’m listening
patiently waiting
to understand
our nature
~
my voice
whispering
your song
encircling our soul
~
Images: Geo Sans
is this
the promise ?
~
dark stillness
tight lungs
wheeze, clench
~
appendages, choke
frantically, clawing
suffocating, ripping
drywall, shelving
~
frantically searching
light
~
some say
we’re only measured
by action
~
not intent
or words
~
my dad’s hands
best symbolize
his essence
~
if you’d ever
shaken my dad’s hand
you’d know
what I mean
~
his big hands,
thick, strong fingers
tough, worn skin
working hands
~
he wore them with a gritty
honesty, grace and dignity
~
almost 9 months
something’s not right
~
the heartbeat
stopped —
the baby still needs
to be delivered
~
holding you
I’ve never felt
so helpless
~
we held him
we named him
~
he looked
so beautiful
so perfect
blood started
to seep out his nose
then all over
his face
~
my body froze
my heart screamed
~
ever since you died
I’ve wanted to believe
in a heaven
~
excluded
your secret language
I’ll never know
or understand
~
my stillborn son
I can never go back
broken
I’ll always be different
give me love
for this pain
~
accepting
capacity
limits
letting go
opening hearts
to trust
~
